Los Angeles Prime Timers Newsletter

L.A. PRIME TIMERS PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE

Los Angeles Prime Timers wishes you a very Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Happy Festivus for the rest of us.  

It’s the season to be happy.  It’s the season for Resolutions.  It’s the season for new beginnings.  And – not wanting to sound trite – it really is the beginning of the rest of your life.

Long ago I decided on the type of life I wanted to end with.  I want it to be one of joy, happiness and enjoyment of my friends.  I don’t want it to be tainted with anger, disappointment and bitterness.  I knew that to achieve the end I wanted, I needed to begin now and work up to it.  It’s impossible to live one way and then on the last day to switch over and be the other way.  No, the time to be happy, joyful and friendly starts now.

And so we wish you happiness, joy, and many friends this season.

Happy Holidays!

CONTRIBUTIONS

PrimeTimers Worldwide Convention
November 2-6, 2011
Palm Springs, California
By Don Ruhl

The International Convention of the Prime Timers Worldwide was held at the Riviera Resort in Palm Springs, California from November 2nd through the 6th. Several members from the Los Angeles Chapter were in attendance along with about 450 other PrimeTimers from around the United States and the rest of the world. Local attendees for the various events included Bert Cassan, Pete Spencer, Bob McCoard, John Murlas, Neil Weikel and Don Ruhl.

Of special note was the attendance of Woody Baldwin, founder of PrimeTimers who celebrated his 90th birthday this year.

Other events at the PTWW convention in Palm Springs included business sessions, informative workshops, and a lot of time for socializing and seeing the local sights. Planned events included a Thursday night Mixer with a four piece band, Friday night dinner with entertainment, and the Follies on a Friday matinee with John Davidson at the Celebrity.  Saturday night was the Grand Banquet with entertainment. On Sunday we had the Palm Springs Gay Pride Parade.

CHUCKLES

Little Johnny
By Ron S.

Little Johnny goes to school and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
Johnny raises his hand and says, "Mas-tur-bate."
The teacher smiles and says, "Wow Johnny, that's a mouthful."
Little Johnny says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

The Nurse
By Ron S.

A very tired nurse walks into a bank, totally exhausted after an 8-hour shift. Preparing to write a check, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake, she looks at the flabbergasted teller, and without missing a beat, she says: “Well, that's great… that's just great… some asshole's got my pen!”

The Doctor
By Jerry B

The doctor had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he just couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal of his patient were overwhelming.

But every once in a while he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice in his head that said: "Don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last. And you're single. Just let it go."

But, invariably, another voice in his head would bring him back to reality, whispering: "You’re a veterinarian, you sick bastard."

New Stick Deodorant
By Jerry B

I got a new stick deodorant today.  The instructions said: Remove cap and push up bottom.

Now I can barely walk, but whenever I fart the room smells lovely.